WAHINGTON, DC -- Amid renewed talks of racial and cultural insensitivity surrounding the use of the term "Redskins" for a football team, many have been calling for team owner Daniel Snyder to change the teams longstanding name. Snyder, after initially refusing, made a concession to those opposed Friday. "I'm okay with the change as long as we can find another slur to replace it with." Snyder announced at press conference. "Preferably something from the 30's or 40's that nobody remembers as an actual slur. You know, something like Mick or Dago."
"I'd be okay with Dago", said Tina, 53. "Most people will just think of it as a type of sandwich, not an offensive name for an Italian person." Third string Quarterback, sex God, and "the biggest dick in the west" (Ed Note - He wouldn't interview unless those last two were put in), Rex Grossman didn't seem to mind, saying "Those guys who do all this bitching about the name need to just go out and get laid, bro. Last week, I banged an Indian chick, or at least I think she was. Anyways, where's my goddamn medal?"
Others were more concerned about another tradition. "I don't really care what the name is as long as we keep raising our expectations every season, only for them to hopelessly crushed." Says Daniel, 58, a lifelong Redskins fan. "I mean, just look at RGIII. Amazing, right? Too bad his knee will be goo in a year or two."
Regardless of their name change, hopeless mediocrity amid high expectations is one tradition set to continue as the Redskins near a 4 year, 56 million contract with 36 year old WR Randy Moss.